Where does the time go?

I was going to write this shortly after my son’s six-month ‘birthday,’ but the job and the dad stuff got in the way, so I put it off for a few days. Two weeks later, I’m finally banging out this draft, wondering where the time goes.

My Opa once said that as he grew older, the days got long but the years got shorter. I never really noticed that stretching and condensing of time until I became a father. When I lay in bed exhausted, I wander what a long, eventful day it was and then I think wasn’t that little guy just born a few days ago? How did he get so big so quickly? Where did those long, full days go? 

Shortly after university, I watched a friend become an active father. It was from that adult’s perspective of parenthood that I saw how much work and sacrifice comes with being a father who’s present, who’s there. I knew going into this fatherhood thing that I was giving up some things to be a part of something that was outside myself.

Aside from the sleep I’ve lost – which barely compares to my wife’s sacrifice at the Altar of No Sleep –the sacrifices I’ve made haven’t been a big deal. It’s the me-centred stuff that’s the first to go, like partying all night or binge-watching an entire series on a rainy afternoon. Easy sacrifices.

And the money? Yes, a baby is expensive, but I would have blown that on whiskey and road trips if he didn’t come along. If anything, my son has grown me up and made me more responsible. He’s made me became a man.

But the time… That’s a sacrifice I’m still getting used to.

With so much more demands on my time and energy, I see time as my most precious resource. And it’s flying by. I don’t feel like I’m wasting it. If anything, I feel as though I’m making a far better use of it than I ever have before. I’m tested and challenged. My son grows every day, and I’m growing too, keeping up with him.

Time might be flying, but it’s not slipping away. And as the six months have raced by, I feel as though my life is fuller than it ever was before. Now if only it would just slow down a little bit, so I can appreciate and hold onto some of these moments just a little bit longer.